I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize