So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Just pee around me
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
You ruined the universe
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
