Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Randomize
