Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
I think I sprained my soul last night
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
