I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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