none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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