I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
