Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize
