So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
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