never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
