you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize
