I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
