Fine. I'll sleep in my office
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize