the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
