I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
It was a blind-side dick pic.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Randomize
