he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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