quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
