never play flip cup with pint glasses
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
