He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize
