hotel room ftw
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
