there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
