you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize
