I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
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