They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
