I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
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