but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
