You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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