Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
