She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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