I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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