i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
You are a genius and a whore.
Randomize
