ADVERTISEMENT

• (812): View more from Indiana

  dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.

  Fav 20 979 4279

  share tweet
  

• (520): View more from Arizona

  im six kinds of drunk right now

  Fav 18 4325 822

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (904): View more from Florida

  someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.

  Fav 21 1052 4418

  share tweet
  

• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?

  Fav 26 4570 1016

  share tweet
  

• (919): View more from North Carolina

  she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay

  Fav 13 3467 987

  share tweet
  

• (919): View more from North Carolina

  Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....

  Fav 7 2324 2579

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (732): View more from New Jersey

  I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout

  Fav 9 2037 1019

  share tweet
  

• (971): View more from Oregon

  Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard

  Fav 1 1361 772

  share tweet
  

• (660): View more from Missouri

  On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.

  Fav 25 3194 931

  share tweet
  

• (250): View more from British Columbia

  the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it

  Fav 1 737 496

  share tweet
  

• (402): View more from Nebraska

  In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party

  Fav 1 804 636

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (585): View more from New York

  I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.

  Fav 3 304 80

  share tweet
  

• (828): View more from North Carolina

  We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is

  Fav 3 207 74

  share tweet
  

• (928): View more from Arizona

  I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!

  Fav 1 57 14

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (214): View more from Texas

  You started having a threesome right in front of me.

  (1-214): View more from Texas

  lololol that's what happened?

  (214): View more from Texas

  Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.

  Fav 0 56 21

  share tweet
  

Randomize