I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
