I don't remember. Are we still dating?
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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