i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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