super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Randomize
