...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
