whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
