I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
