I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
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