singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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