i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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