Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
