I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
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