we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Randomize