I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
He shit in the fireplace
Randomize
