false alarm. still invincible.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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