he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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