Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
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