Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I'm bleeding and have questions
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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