Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
